I Think You Might Mean "Casualness" [Oct 29, 2003]

Loyal visitors of The Neal Pollack Invasion, our time together is once again nearing its end. Tomorrow will be my final day. Monday, Neal will return, and I, Matthew Tobey, will crawl back into your dreams. But before then, I plan to do all that I can to leave your mind feeling violated and your body feeling liberated.

Before I take another step toward educasturbating your soul though, I'd be remiss if I didn't remind you that if you don't watch Neal on Comedy Central's The Daily Show with Jon Stewart tonight, Elizabeth Smart will be re-kidnapped.

Now that that's out of the way, let's get down to business.

If you're like most human beings, you were saddened and dismayed when the news came out today that the postwar casualties in Iraq had surpassed the during-war casualties. And while it is almost always sad when someone dies and while in hindsight it might appear that President Bush's celebratory, dramatic and seemingly-smug appearance on the USS Lincoln in front of a sign that read, "Mission Accomplished" was our Commander in Chief's way of pissing on the graves of any soldier who couldn't hack it after May 1, it's important to remember that this type of thing is quite common.

For example, as recently as 1973, the Japanese continued to bomb Pearl Harbor, Hawaii every now and again, "just for old time's sake."

Likewise, this past April, eleven Union soldiers were killed in an ambush by the Confederacy outside of Minnesota's Mall of America, raising the total number of U.S. Civil War casualties to just over four million.

Moreover, many of the recent soldiers killed in Iraq actually count toward the postwar casualties of the first Gulf War. Five of them were technically and officially part of the post-War of 1812 effort.

The point is, be it before, during or after a war, for a good cause, no apparent reason or thinly-veiled imperialism, our forces will incur losses. Otherwise, what would I blog about on Thursday, October 30, 2003?

Haypenny. The City of Floating Blogs. Email.